Gray divorce, where married couples over the age of 50 decide to call it quits, is becoming increasingly common nowadays. In fact, divorce rates for individuals between the ages of 55 and 65 are higher than any other age group.
If you are thinking of ending your marriage, you probably already know divorce can take a toll on the emotional well-being of children. This is true even if your kids are adults. Here are three tips for telling your kids about your upcoming divorce.
1. Present a unified front
When they hear about your divorce, your adult children may worry about holidays and other family events. After all, if you are no longer with your spouse, your kids may fear you can no longer be together as a complete family.
Asking your husband or wife to meet with you and your children may be a good idea. If you go this route, try to be both friendly and positive. Having a plan to address the first year of family events may also be helpful.
2. Answer questions
Your adult kids may need time to process the news of your divorce. While they may have a few questions for you immediately, your children may need to ask additional ones in the days and weeks after your announcement. Taking the time to provide thoughtful answers may reassure your children.
3. Set firm boundaries
While your kids may have a right to know about your divorce, they do not need to know everything. If there are topics you are not comfortable discussing, be sure to set firm boundaries. Remember, your adult children do not control either your life or your marital choices.
Informing adult kids about a divorce may seem awkward, but it does not have to be a negative or traumatic experience. Ultimately, any effort you put into planning the conversation is likely to pay off.